Networking is more than just putting your business name out there for people to find you, but it is also a part of getting to know people, who are going to spread the word about what you do, what you sell, and that are going to support you in all that you do. Networking is going to involve getting to know as many people in life as you can, and putting your business in front of those people, so they will represent your name, your business, and will tell others about what you have to offer.

If your business requires that you travel often, or perhaps you travel often to find supplies, visit relatives or just because you like it. You should make it a point to get to know those who you are sitting beside, those who are surrounding you on the plane, even those who are sitting on the bench while waiting in the airport. Make it a point to meet and greet at least one new person a day.

How are you going to get started on this?

Start the conversation by saying hello, how are you today?
Ask questions. The best way to get to know someone is to ask questions. Without asking questions, it can be difficult to carry on a conversation. Asking questions is a good icebreaker, in turn, the person is going to want to talk about their self, and where they are traveling too. You can then lead into something like, is this business trip or a personal trip? As you go on with the conversation, the person is going to ask you questions, which is where you will be able to talk about your business and what you do.

As you make it a point to get to know at least one new person a day- you are going to increase your network, which means you will increase the people that you know in life. Increasing your business network is going to be dependent on your abilities to carry on a conversation and to talk with others. Force yourself to do this. Force yourself to stick to your habit of meeting at least one new person a day. As you make this a point, you will make this a habit and in the long run, your business will thrive for it.

Whether it is nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them.î

– William Shakespeare, Hamlet, Act III, Scene i (58-90)

Hamlet may not have been talking about network marketing, but his words do apply. Almost every network marketer has experienced the ìslings and arrowsî of the naysayers, those often well-meaning friends and relatives that stand in the way of our making an ìoutrageous fortune!î Experienced network marketers, clothed in the armor of past success, are less vulnerable to outside influences. The new distributor, however, is vulnerable, and that ìsea of troublesî can act as a barrier to reaching their true potential.

What did the knights of old do to prevent an injury? Thatís right ñ they armed themselves. Their armor was heavy and cumbersome, and they needed a squire to help them prepare for battle. Well, the same is true for your new distributors. While the armor they must use is less cumbersome than that of the knights, you must help them arm themselves for success. In other words, you must be their squire.

What do I mean by arming for success?

When a new distributor joins your network marketing organization, they are moving into an environment that demands strong armor. There are a lot of ìslings and arrowsî that can hurt their chances for success and create a sea of troubles — of doubt, disbelief, even failure.

As Rich Dad, Poor Dad author Robert T. Kiyosaki points out, most people in this world are afraid to experience success. They are held back by negative thinking, and consequently suffer the pain of mediocrity. Because they have not been armed for success, and are more focused on security and survival, they subject themselves to a life of servitude and poverty and being someone elseís employee.

Arm your new distributors from negative thinking and potential disaster. How? By understanding why so many people are negative about network marketing and the prospects of the success it can bring.

Letís face it. There are a lot of people out there that do not want you to become successful. When you are successful, you point out the lack of success in their lives. When you take away any excuses theyíve been hanging onto and you force them to look at their lives as they really are, it makes them very uncomfortable. Youíve heard of the expression ìMisery loves company.î Well, itís true.

Doug Firebaugh, network marketing guru, calls it the “Unspoken Understanding,” which is simply the silent agreement that most people have with each other, namely ìdon’t mention my mediocre life, and I won’t mention yours.î Your success and the success of your new distributors, just points out the naysayersí mediocrity.

Leaders help others. If you are going to be successful in network marketing, you must arm your new distributors against people who will try to convince them their business won’t work. Show your downline you want them to be successful. Encourage them. Show them how the most successful network marketers have achieved their success, and teach them to model those attitudes, habits, and actions. Remind your distributors that they are the CEO of their lives. Arm them with the power of positive thinking so they donít let others live their lives for them with their negative attitudes.

To paraphrase Hamlet, by opposing negative thoughts, we end them.

In my mind, small talk basically consists of 3 phases:
<ol><li>The ice breaker</li>
<li>Get to know you better</li>
<li>Graceful exit</li>
</ol>So letís go ahead and briefly touch on each phase and in turn give you some concrete takeaway strategies that you can apply immediately for each.

<b>Phase 1: The Ice Breaker</b>
So you attend a networking eventÖ you make eye contact with someone you want to meet, you approach them and introduce yourselfÖ now what?

Well having a few powerful, open-ended ice breaker questions should certainly do the trick. For example:
<ul><li>A tried and true ice breaker is the proverbial, ìSo Jeff, what do you do?î In other words ìJeff, what business are you in? Now people love talking about themselves and their business so the idea here is to get them started talking. Most people also love to hear the sound of their own voice so the ice breaker question is critical and essentially sets the tone and potential for the conversation.</li>
<li>Another good ice breaker could be, ìSo Jeff, what brings you here today?î</li></ul>
Now notice on these sample ice breaker questions Iíve repeated the personís name. First off by doing this it will help burn that personís name into my head so I donít forget it. Secondly, people love the sound of their own name ñ so donít be afraid to use it throughout your conversation.

<b>Phase 2: Get To Know You Better</b>
Depending on the results of the ice breaker questions you should by now be able to determine whether or not it makes sense to get to know this person better. If not, simply skip this phase and go into your graceful exit. But if you do see a synergy here, by all means try some of these again open-ended, getting to know you better questions:
<ul><li>So Jeff, how did you get into that business?</li>
<li>What types of challenges keep you up at night?</li>
<li>Jeff, help me out here, draw me a mental picture, what does success look like for you and your business?</li>
<li>Whatís new in your industry these days? Any events or trends that are shaping it?</li></ul>
Now you can use one, two, all of these questions, or more if the situation permits. However, be careful here not to dominate and monopolize someoneís time. If youíre at a networking event, thereís a good chance that theyíre there to network and meet other people as well, so it may make sense to go to the graceful exit phase and encourage that you two get together in the near future.

<b>Phase 3: Graceful Exit</b>
Itís vastly important how you leave a conversation ñ as this is the last impression you make on that person. Weíre not looking to create any animosity here by rudely blowing someone off. The key here is as this phaseís title states, is to exit gracefully.

A key difference between the types of questions or statements you make in this phase as opposed to the previous two phases is that now you shift to using close-ended ones. For example:
<ul><li>Introduce the person to someone else that may be of interest to them and then politely excuse yourself. The dialogue can go something like this: ìHey Cindy Iíd like you to meet Jeff. Jeffís in the xyz industry as well and I just felt that you two should meet.î Now they exchange pleasantries and you immediately exit the conversation by saying something like, ìWell you two probably have a bunch to talk about. Cindy Iíll catch up with you later and Jeff, it was great meeting you.î</li>
<li>Another example of a graceful exit may be: I can certainly see some synergy between what you and I do. Can I give you a call next week to set up some time to talk further?</li>
<li>Or, itís been great meeting you, will I see you at future meetings?</li>
<li>And lastly, wow, this is quite an event donít you think? Well we should probably keep movingÖ it was great meeting you Jeff!</li>
</ul>

So now you’re aware of and armed with some actual strategies for the 3 phases of small talk. The key now is to get in the game and practice, practice, practice and you too can see the results you would like for your business.
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At a Chamber of Commerce Business Card Exchange several years ago a well-dress woman walked up to me, business card in hand and, in perfect form held it in both hands in front of me, gesturing for me to take it. I took the card from her and smiled. She looked up and in a polite voice, said “Thank you,” and walked away. How sad. Here was this obviously well-intentioned woman, who most likely owned an interesting business but never learned what to do at a card exchange. Somewhere she bought into the idea that you were suppose to hand out as many business cards in as little time as possible. Clearly, this does nothing but waste business cards. Great for card businesses, not so great for yours.

The other extreme is the person who spends the entire time at a card exchange talking to the same individual, sometimes even people from their own company. Again, this is quite unproductive. The purpose of a business card exchange is to get to meet new people in a pleasant atmosphere.

While there are many good books to help you hone your networking skills including, Sue Roaneís How to Work a Room, the essence of networking is quite simple.

Businesses run on relationships. Iíve always felt that everything that we do is about personal relationships and a business just gives us a playing field on which to do it.

Following that theme, growing your business is about developing and nurturing relationships and card exchanges and similar networking events are really the starting point to begin what will hopefully become a mutually rewarding relationship.

Since your time is limited, it is a good idea to spend only a short time speaking with people, especially those you already know. If you feel a resonance with someone youíre talking with, make arrangements to follow-up your connection at a later date and move on to meet someone else. Iím sure the shy looking person in the corner, who is probably there for the very first time, has something interesting to say. Why not go over and extend your hand.

The other big faux paus I see over and over again, are the people who approach the networking meeting with a “me, me, me” attitude. A better approach is to learn about the other person first. You then have the option of explaining how what you do might be of interest to them. This establishes a stronger platform for communications, for as speaking legend Zig Zigler says, “You get what you want by helping other people get what they want.”

Care about the other person

There are better ways to network and meet prospective business contacts. For openers, (no pun intended) people are more responsive if you first show some interest in them and what they do. There is an old clichÈ that says we have one mouth and two ears for a reason. If you listen more than you talk, you will automatically find people more interested in talking with you and being around you.

Marketing guru, Jay Abraham, once said that “Discovery is the fuel of competitive advantage.” Get curious. Become interested in other people and what makes them tick. Really care about the other person. If you take the time to investigate, you will find that even those people who appear quite ordinary have a story to tell. If you show an interest in them and their lives, you will not only increase your chances of doing business with them but you may gain a friend as well.

How do you do that?

When you do introduce yourself, do so in a way that states the benefit of doing business with you. Saying “Hi, my name is Mary and I sell insurance” is not very exciting. However, if you were to say, “My name is Mary and I help people prepare for the uncertainty that may be in their future.” This causes the other person, if they are at all curious, to ask, “How do you do that?” At this point, you have opened the door for a further explanation or “commercial” for your business. You can go on to explain the benefits of your products and services.

As an exercise, devise three or four ways to introduce your business. Let each one focus on a different benefit of your product or service. Test each of them at your next networking event.

Remember: people do not buy products or services, they buy benefits and solutions.
The more you focus on communicating the benefits gained from using your products or services, the more you will benefit from the increase in business.

With prospecting new business becoming more and more difficult, a personal relationship is even more important and the Chamber of Commerce Card Exchange offers the perfect playground for you do it, besides the food is usually pretty good too.